Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Tuesday 2 November 2010

Oh God. Oh God.

I am horrified. HORRIFIED I tell you.

Disclaimer: If you are single, love shoes and have an extensive shoe collection, stop reading. Now.

You may continue reading if you don't care about shoes because I just have to tell someone.

OK, I accept that my womb will never be inside the cage of my pelvis after this. I accept that I have gained weight. I accept that my mind is no longer as sharp as it used to be and that I lose track of days (I didn't even know today was Tuesday). I accept that I am all kinds of hairy, I can smell things no one can and I keep wanting to clean until things squeak. I accept that I will never experience anything like pregnancy ever in my life.

What I cannot accept - and what I have leant to be true - is that I will NEVER be the same shoe size again! Why?! What will happen to all my lovely shoes?! Do you know how many unworn pairs of shoes I have saved up?

And the worst thing is, one is not advised to splurge until one has had all their children because one does not know what shoe size one might end up with.

My friends, these are scary times. And there are scarier times ahead. What if I end up looking like I borrowed a pair of feet from Bilbo Baggins?


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